The past few weeks have been awful, creativity-wise. I feel stuck and I’m out of ideas. I’m slow and sluggish. I’m stressed out and I feel like I’m letting everyone around me down. I’ve missed deadlines, I’ve forgot to attach the right files in emails, and I’m creating things that aren’t up to what I think is my usual standard of work. I’m a grade-A space cadet. Is it because Mercury is in retrograde? I don’t know. I don’t know much about that kind of stuff, I just see a lot of memes about it.
Honestly, I don’t think spending 8-9 hours a day in a cubicle helps, not matter how many pictures I have hanging up of Betty White or my dog. Behind the pictures is a fuzzy gray wall blocking any view of the outside world (but not the smells of people’s microwave popcorn or leftover fish from last night) and that’s SO motivating.
The town I live in doesn’t have much going on. There’s two dead malls, a never-ending supply of fast food restaurants, and an Old Navy but that’s about it. Living here just makes me miss my old life in Minneapolis a lot. I felt like there was always something to do and here there isn’t much going on at all.
I’m going on a mini road trip to Missouri this Friday and staying there until Wednesday. I’m both looking forward to it and dreading it. I think it’ll help me refresh my brain but I also feel so stressed that I don’t know if I’ll even be able to enjoy my short break.
Not really sure what all this rambling will accomplish but I felt like I had already worn out my friends and family with me talking about this, so maybe throwing it into the internet world will help.